Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Me, My Kidney, and I

I have a kidney infection.

I wasn't going to blog about this but by now any of my co-workers who read UFF know why I haven't been at work this week anyway, and since my diet of apples and chocolate milk hasn't caused any sort of remarkable weight loss (which, really? that would have been the one upside to this whole ordeal), they won't suspect that I've been away at a spa retreat. Trust me, it's been no retreat.

Last night I felt particularly crappy and Ken was out at class, so I called my mom. When she answered the phone I promptly reverted to being seven years old by blubbering, "Mommy, I'm so sick!" [-10 Dignity Points] Anyway, she was awesome. She gave me all the best Mom-advice possible.

Mom: You need to drink lots of water. Are you drinking lots of water?
Me: Yes.
Mom: Gillian, *promise* me you are drinking lots of water.
Me: I am. And apple juice, and chocolate milk.
Mom: Well, the apple juice is good, but not too much chocolate milk.
Me: I'm drinking two half-cup servings of chocolate milk per day.
Mom: Oh that's fine, as long as it's not a quart a day!

Apparently she'd mistaken me for her other child.

Also, I wasn't kidding about eating *only* apples and chocolate milk. Last night I spread some almond butter on the apple slices 'cause I was feeling wild. So I talked to Mom about whether she thought getting some Ensure or something like it would be a good idea.

Mom: Yeah, sure, that can't hurt.
Me: OK, I think I'll go get--
Mom: Oh no, you won't go get it.
Me: It's OK, I'm going over to Leslie's in a bit--
Mom: Oh no, oh no. You're not going anywhere. You're not to leave the house today, and I think not tomorrow either.

Which, yeah, considering I hadn't been out of bed for more than two hours at a time, and considering that I get a massive pounding headache every time I turn my head... She's probably right.

So then, for the first time in 15 years, I had to call my friend and tell her that I couldn't come over "because my mom won't let me."

[I do feel better this afternoon, and even though I stood her up last night, Leslie was awesome enough to send over dinner for tonight! Which is good, because I think we're out of apples.]


Our Heads Are Helmets said...

oh sweetie, i feel so badly for you! you're taking antibiotics, right? infections are serious business, miss. take care of yourself!

Candace said...

Oh, wow, this sounds awful. I hope you're feeling better, wish I could make you some soup.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I call my mom and whimper that I'm sick at the first sign of a cold. Screw dignity, she changed your diapers! Not recently, obviously.

I've had to google what a kidney infection is. Man, I hope you're feeling better soon.

Anonymous said...

Yikes, so sorry to hear this. Hope you're feeling better soon!

Elizabeth said...

Oh no! Feel better soon. Can I do anything to help? Bring over some apples maybe?

Brianna said...


Are apples really the best thing to be eating? /end uninformed mom

kfinnefrock said...

Oh ick. I have no helpful hints as I had to ask mr internet what it meant - sorry! Feel better soon!