Tuesday, February 12, 2008


OK Internet, I admit it, I've been holding out on you. But holy crap do I have some good news: I am moving into what may be my absolutely perfect and ideal apartment. And so I bring you:

The UFF FAQ to Gillian's Brand New Awesome Apartment

Q: What's so great about this new apartment?
A: I would have a much easier time answering what ISN'T great about it, to which the answer would be NOTHING. But since you asked, here is a partial list of what it has:

1. A beautiful kitchen with very new appliances (including a kickass stainless steel fridge and a gorgeous gas range)
2. A private (!) backyard
3. Two bedrooms, one of which will be used as an office
4. The closet of my dreams (in fact, I didn't even know I had a dream closet until I saw this one!)
5. Laundry in the basement

Also, crazily, the current tenants not only have the same rug I have in my bedroom now, they painted the bedroom to match it. And cats are welcome, which is, as you know, a requirement.

Q: Where are these fabulous new digs, anyway?
A: I'm glad you asked! The apartment is steps away from (for real, not the fake Craigslist ad "steps away from" which is short for "steps away from the subway that will take you to") Prospect Park and Grand Army Plaza (and the Green Market!), not to mention a Crunch gym (hello HBMAMJJASOND!). There's also excellent public transportation nearby (my commute will be a very reasonable 40 minutes).

Q: Why are you leaving BP:LE? I thought it was the cat's meow!
A: It's been a good six months, but despite a few moments of harmony, Memphis and Grapple are decidedly not BFF. But that's not the main reason...

Q: Will you be living in GBNAA alone, Missy?
A: Tee hee. No. I will be sharing the apartment with my special friend. Did I mention tee hee? I'll introduce you to him soon, promise. Let's just say things are very happy, and I definitely have a Valentine this year.

Q: When are you moving?
A: March 1!

I do need to bitch for a moment about the process of applying for an apartment in NY. It SUCKS. For one, you can't really start looking for a place until a few weeks before you're ready to move, because the market moves so quickly. You have to submit a crazily huge application package, including pay stubs and income tax info, references (yes, written references), and a credit check. Your annual income needs to be at least 40x the monthly rent. Then you have to wait for a few days while you anxiously pick at your cuticles until they are all bleeding - oh, wait, that might just be me. When you finally sign the lease (a year, minimum) you usually need to pay first and last months' rent plus a security deposit (usually another month's rent). And all that is if you're lucky enough to find a place without using brokers, who are not only slimy liars (Windsor Terrace might be getting nicer, but that doesn't mean that Park Slope is "growing"), they also charge ridiculously high fees (1-3 months' rent, FOR REAL).

Anyhoo, I can start letting the skin on my fingers grow back now. Too many good times to even count.

P.S. Thanks for all the awesome comments about the cake! Did I mention that they *paid* for it? Did I also mention good times?


Lindsay said...

wow, exciting! congrats!

Lisa said...

special friends, tee hee

WTWTG said...

so when is the house warming?

Anonymous said...

Big deal. One would think you found the cure for cancer.

Anonymous said...

right! now that would be a blog entry. diary blogs are so boring!

Elizabeth said...

Congratulations, that's so exciting. It sounds awesome. PRIVATE backyard?? Wow.

Candace said...

Isn't is great when something is so incredible you didn't even know to wish for it? Closets and otherwise?

Harmony Jupiter said...

Congratulations, beauty. I want to see the new apartment and meet the special friend...